These past few months have been almost a blur. Sorry for not being faithful in my writings by keeping you updated. But as I write this you will have a better understanding.
The end of September my husband Bob had a heart attack. Completely coming out of nowhere, it certainly was a life changer in our ministry here at Calvary Exeter.
Early morning on September 27th as he underwent surgery, I sat in the corridor of the hospital full of sadness, wonderment, and fear which fell upon me. Being all alone, my soul searched for comfort in God.
As my heart cried out in panic and despair, I heard a still small voice saying, “Be still and know that I am God.” "I will give you the treasures of darkness” Isaiah 45:3. And that was the comfort in my affliction, Gods word, for it gave me life in that moment of my despair. In the many hours which lied ahead, His peace flooded my soul, even though I had no answers. Yet somehow I knew Bob would be ok.
As the weeks and now the months have gone by, it has been one of the hardest things we both have had to go through, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Days on end crying out, "Lord, what are we to do now? Are we to leave our missionary life in the land we love? Are you putting us on a shelf to not serve anymore here or anywhere for that matter?"
In Psalm 71:9 I am reminded that David also felt the a similar way as he poured out his heart to the Lord in that time of unknowingness. He wrote, “Do not cast me off in the time of old age; do not forsake me when my strength fails”.
This became our prayer as we waited on the Lord. We knew it was time for Bob to give over pastoring Exeter but is this it? We loved this land and the people, yet we wanted a clear direction in the Lord's calling. And God faithfully spoke to our hearts as He daily provided the strength and healing and direction that we both needed.
Friends came from near and far to visit. But one particular day, the Lord gave us the answer we were looking for through one particular couple. As the husband was speaking, Luke 22:31-32 was mentioned in a random context. But it clearly gave us an unusual sense that this was the answer we so desperately needed.
It truly was the treasure in our darkness in the direction we now needed to go. This scripture pointed to the fact as Bob returned to full health, we should then strengthen the brethren over here. Our ministry would now be full time with Poimen, going out in the U.K. and Europe ministering and helping various churches ⛪ in whatever the need may be.
So, excited and happy to see what God had in mind, we rejoice with a thrill of hope this Christmas season and for the New Year ahead.
In closing, I would like to include a quote from J. R. Miller from my daily devotion which spoke to my heart. May it encourage, strengthen and comfort you as it did for me....
"In the famous lace shops of Brussels, there are special rooms devoted to the spinning of the world’s finest lace, all with the most delicate patterns. The rooms are kept completely dark, except for the light that falls directly on the developing pattern, from one very small window. Only one person sits in each small room, where the narrow rays of light fall upon the threads he is weaving, for lace is always more beautifully and delicately woven when the weaver himself is in the dark, with only his work in the light.
Sometimes the darkness in our lives is worse, because we cannot even see the web we are weaving or understand what we are doing. Therefore we are unable to see any beauty or any possible good arising from our experience. Yet if we are faithful to forge ahead and “if we do not give up” (Gal. 6:9), someday we will know that the most exquisite work of our lives was done during those days when it was the darkest. If you seem to be living in deep darkness because God is working in strange and mysterious ways, do not be afraid. Simply go forward in faith and in love, never doubting Him. He is watching and will bring goodness and beauty from all of your pain and tears." J. R. Miller.
So, standing by my man, we march on with courage. Psalm 68:35 “the God of Israel is He who gives strength and power to His people.”
